trolling so hard

ENSIFERUM, FINNTROLL, and ROTTEN SOUND
February 17, 2011
@ the Zoo
By D.C.S. Murray
Last night I lived out a fantasy that I’ve had since I was about sixteen years old, to see Finnish folk-metal act Finntroll perform live. Finntroll play a unique variety of extreme metal blended with traditional Finnish polka music called ‘Humppa’, they sing about the exploits of the troll-king ‘Rivfader’ and they dress up in full troll regalia when they perform live. Combined with the opening band Ensiferum (also Finnish, but these guys dress up and sing about Iron-age warriors instead of Trolls). I was sure that I was headed into a dark and nerdy place that would leave me in desperate need of some D&D afterward. I was definitely surprised.
The show was happening at the Zoo, a venue that I ashamedly had never been to before. Due to an unfortunate scheduling conflict I arrived late, missing the first band, Barren Earth. We entered just as “Rotten Sound” was getting into full-swing. Even though they were by far the least nerdy band there I do have to mention these guys. It was grind music at it’s absolute best; uber-fast and ultra-heavy, ballsy enough to break straight into a D-beat for no reason at all, and mature enough not to be wearing corpse-paint and Mayhem t-shirts. They were the exact opposite reason I was there, nonetheless I enjoyed it immensely and would definitely recommend them to anyone who is bored of entry-level death-metal and fashioncore.
After a short cigarette break and several very confused partial conversations, we found out that Finntroll would be coming on first and playing a shorter set due to the entire band being under the weather. This was about when I noticed it: You would think that a show where three out of the four acts have something or other to do with ancient mythology the crowd would be a rather homogenous group of 18 to 20-something males who all knew each other from Comic-Con, but as I stood staring at the excited faces I saw something very different. Woolen-capped hipster babes sat astride the shoulders of behemoth vikings, and men who looked like my 51-year-old father sporting celtic-knot t-shirts were playing pool with long haired death metal kids. On my way to the bathroom I accidentally bumped into a very-large biker type and almost spilled his beer. Being the spineless whelp I am, apologies began tumbling forth from my mouth. He smiled, let out a hearty-laugh and said the smartest thing I’d heard all night. “Don’t worry about it, Bro. We’re all here for the same thing.” It was true, as I made my way through the crowd and the band began to play my fantasy commenced and everyone in the audience became one.
Guitarist Skrymer was sporting war paint that curled down his face, chest, and back like the gnarled roots of Yggdrasil while vocalist Vreth commanded us to do his bidding from his perch on top of the monitor. Snot poured from the nostrils of these men like fountains and dark bags under their eyes were apparent through the make-up but that only seemed to make them play more intensely. Though their set was only about 45 minutes and consisted of a lot of new material that I was unfamiliar with, every moment of Finntroll’s performance was engrossing. Filled with chunky polka bass beats and some seriously soviet vocal breakdowns, they proved that a little influenza will not stop an army of angry Trolls. I emerged from the mosh-pit drenched with the collective perspiration of what now felt like my family. I was 16 again.
My last surprise of the night came in the form of Ensiferum, the band that was supposed to open for Finntroll. I had earlier dismissed Ensiferum as “uninspired garbage metal that all sounds the same.” I would like to take this moment to apologize to Ensiferum and all of their fans. They were not only fast-loud and loaded with songs about traversing the frozen wasteland (a subject that we’re all too familiar with) but they also have melodies simple enough that anyone in the audience can and are encouraged to sing along with. The musicianship was complex but not masturbatory. Even though the lyrical themes are so specific, the music and the atmosphere of this band seemed to grab everyone in the room, get them blood-drunk and rally them together into a rag-tag army of misfits.
In summation, Rotten Sound gave me something to think about, Finntroll gave me release and Ensiferum gave me a swift kick in the ass that I won’t soon forget.